死荫的侍女 遐蝶 Servant of Death: Castorice
蹁跹零落花间 Twirling in Fallen Bloom
1-1
我看见，一把赐死的剑，
一束囚命的锁链，
伴于银发的少女身边，
受奉于亡殁的圣殿。
I see a sword that grants death,
A shackle of destiny,
Next to the silver-haired girl,
Worshiped at the demise's hallow.
剑染着了不知何人的鲜血，业已断裂。
锁链牵着白皙的手腕，锈斑点点。
The sword stained with unknown blood, lying shattered and snapped.
The shackle chained pale wrists, dotted in thickening rust.
祭司用颤抖的声音发问——
蝴蝶会停留在何人指尖？
The priest asks with a shaking voice—
Upon whose fingertips will the butterfly perch?
少女从不予以回答，
正如死亡，缄默不言。
The girl never answers,
Like death itself, wreathed in silent solemnity.
1-2
人们常说，
死是与灰黯之手合掌，
梦则是被它的小指轻掠。
People often say that,
Dying is to meet the palm of the Hand of Shadow,
And dreaming is to be brushed by their fingers a little.
在少女轻触死亡的幻景中，
她看到漆黑瀑布浪潮滔滔，
从天帷的豁口喷涌而下，淹没一切，
只剩一座高塔，立在汹涌浪间。
In the mirages when the girl petted death,
She sees black waterfalls foaming and bellow,
Pouring down from a chasm in the sky,
Where a solitary tower withstands torrents sallow.
当她醒来，仍能感到水花的冰冷刺骨，
与翻涌的潮声刺耳——
似魂灵的哀哭，似困兽的咆哮，
昏惑，冥迷，悲恸喧阗。
When she wakes, she can still feel the water's freezing touch,
And the cacophony's billow—
Like the wail of the dead, the howl of beasts,
In confusion, delirium, and clamors hollow.
1-3
少女的怀抱不属于生者，
但能予以死者抚慰与尊严，
那怀中溘然长逝者，不计其数。
The girl's embrace is not meant for the living.
Thousands have entered the eternal sleep in her arms,
Granting to the dead solace and dignity.
少女提及一位杀名赫赫的战士……
「她并非含笑而终，而是咒骂着我——」
「生命的终结啊，你是如此丑恶，令人生厌。」
She mentions a ferocious warrior, feared in battle...
"She did not go with a smile, but to me, she cursed—"
"O, life's end! How ugly you are! How despicable!"
自那时起，她便有了新的仪容，
如月光般皓白的衣裙上，
总是缀满了花蕾。
And from that day on, she adorned herself.
Her dress, white as a radiant moon,
Became always dotted with flowery petals.
「若死亡不可避免……」
少女说，
「我希望它，更美一些。」
"For if death cannot be avoided..."
So says the girl,
"I wish it could contain beauty more plentiful."
1-4
在诸般关乎死亡的祭礼中，
少女最常主持的是葬仪。
Among the manifold rites about death,
The ones she knows with most intimacy are burial rites.
她葬下一个又一个陌生的面庞，
她记得早夭婴孩的睡颜，
也记得母亲绝望的眼神，
她记得战死将领的伤痕，
也记得孤孀满面的泪涟。
One burial of unfamiliar countenance after another wherever she presided,
From the angelic visage of a babe passed in the cradle,
To the despairing eyes of the mother drowning in sorrow.
From the scars on a war-battered general's torso,
To the unending tears pouring from his bereft widow.
但她不记得任何一位过往相识的生者，
有时甚至会感到自己的容颜无比生疏。
在被遗忘埋葬的千言中，
她能捞起的唯一话语，如同对命运的讥讽——
Yet she remembers not a single living human she had seen,
Even in the mirror, she thinks her own face strange, with an alien glow.
In the countless words buried in forgetfulness,
The only thing she manages to gleam is a mockery to fate, a sarcastic whistle—
「活下去。」
"Stay alive."
1-5
少女抛下锁链，踏出哀地里亚时，
感到此刻似曾相识，
或许，她并非第一次逃离。
When she cast aside the shackles and stepped beyond Aidonia,
A déjà vu most violent seizes her whole.
Did she, perchance, conduct some previous escape?
眼前晃过几缕泡影——
自己曾在漫无边际的河中漂流，
而后驾着孤舟，驶出湍流。
自己曾在尸横遍野的疆场游荡，
而后寻见生路，踏出荒冢。
Illusions dance across her eyes—
She had once drifted in an endless river,
Then drove her single boat out of the deluge.
She had wandered in the battlefield covered in corpses,
Then recovered the path back to life.
为何她要一次次逃离？
这次，她知晓答案，却深感荒谬——
被视为死亡的女子奔走于世，
只是因为明白，要活下去。
Why must she escape? Over and over again?
She now knows the answer and quivers, for it is a ludicrous surmise—
The woman embodying death walks this world,
Only because she knows she must stay alive.
但是啊——
彼时，她尚且不知。
死亡并非终结，
只是蝴蝶落在枯花的枝头，
无足轻重。
But alas—
At that time, she knows not,
That death is not the end.
It is only a butterfly landing on a withered branch.
Utterly meaningless. Profoundly trite.
仍愿将生世妆点 Willing to Adorn The Living
2-1
生来蒙承恶咒，
那致人死地的铅白与朱砂，
她都能亲手装点逝者容颜。
相传，她的技艺能给予任何一人美貌，
甚至使人改头换面。
Born with an evil curse,
Her hand dips into lethal cinnabar and white lead,
To personally decorate the faces of the dead.
Her skills are said to bestow beauty on anyone,
Even transforming their appearance completely.
2-2
避世独处催生了诸般技艺，
也令她的住处颇显阴森——
此处招待过寥寥数人，
飞贼和织者有幸成为其中之二。
Many skills were born out of her seclusion,
But it painted her dwelling in a gloomy vision —
Only a select few have set foot in this mansion,
And the thief and the weaver were two such lucky persons.
其间少女与万物交谈…
标本，茶具，甚至诸多枕头，
仿佛她能听见死物的回应。
「我向来深居简出…」
「出于礼节，以此演练一言一行。」
The girl converses with all items in the house...
With specimens, tea sets, and even pillows in profusion,
As if she can hear the responses of these non-living things.
"I have always lived in isolation..."
"Out of courtesy, this is how I practice my words and actions."
她的解释难以尽信——
那交谈时的神情太过温柔，
若非言不由衷，
便是将所遇之人，皆视为孩童。
Tis hard to believe her explanation —
Her face when talking shows such a gentle disposition,
That unless she is telling fabrications,
She must regard her partners as mere children.
2-3
人们如此口口相传——
由她划定的方圆内，
万事万物就此凝固，
逃离了岁月的河流。
People passed these rumors down —
within the area of her encirclement,
All things became frozen,
escaping time's increments.
那当然是夸大其词，在战争的遗迹中，
人们只寻得了古老的狮首。
「此言非虚。」
它也已然濒临毁灭，
「纵使死战得胜，
战士们却已无力回天。」
「是那栖居死亡的怀间，
提早结束了他们的苦痛。」
It is an exaggeration, that is certain.
People only found an ancient lion's head in battle's ruined armaments.
"Those words are true."
The head itself was nearly dead.
"Though they won in fierce battle,
the warriors were powerless to turn the tide."
"It was the embrace where death dwelled
that gave early release from their pain."
死亡逃离时间的方式即是如此——
她将每一次临终的拥抱，
悉数藏于不朽的心间。
This is how Death escapes Time —
She keeps every final embrace,
Hidden in her immortal heart.
2-4
在她制的众多作品里，
蝶与花往往非比寻常——
将其点燃，仿佛可听闻作者絮语。
于死亡的寂然之中，
她的声音清晰可见。
Out of her numerous works,
Butterflies and flowers often stand out stark —
Ignite them, and you can almost hear the maker's remark.
Even in death's silence,
Her sound can still be heard.
那是少女珍重万分的赠礼，
少有人能获此殊荣，
It is a gift greatly treasured by the maiden,
Few have the honor to be graced with such work.
忍心令此礼燃烧的仅有一人，
她给出的原因略显牵强——
「我需将一切不可知的命运窥明。」
Only one has the heart to burn such a gift,
And the reason she gives is rather far-fetched —
"I must peer into all fates unknown."
2-5
岁月的伟力无边，
但仍有一事无力征服。
「众人眼中，死亡面目可憎。」
「除却身份，我无一事能引人赞颂。」
The power of time is boundless,
but there is one thing it cannot conquer.
"Death is abominable in humans' eyes."
"Apart from my identity, there's nothing about me worthy of praise."
受人爱戴的金织闻得少女惘然，
试图向她传授纺织的技艺。
据称，她曾有作品留于圣城。
然而，织者的言语为此作结——
The beloved Goldweaver hears this in distress,
Then tries to teach her the art of weaving and threads.
It has been said that the maiden has works that the holy city possesses.
But this is the judgment the Goldweaver expresses —
「…也罢，无人能够精通万事。」
「她的作品于生者而言，还为时尚早。」
"... Ah, well, none can know all things, nor be skilled in all crafts."
"Her works are too early for the living to comprehend."
怀抱未枯的心 With A Heart Unwithered
3-1
在送别死者时，
她将石板徒劳地丢入火焰。
我未曾听闻何地有此番遗俗。
To the dead, when she bids farewell,
She casts the slate into the fire, an act futile.
I have never heard of lands with such customs.
彼时，石板上有某物汩汩而下，
其色纷繁，
似是替那冷漠的死神落泪。
原来，那石板上刻写着诗篇，
每个词汇，
都曾被色彩精心点缀。
At this time, something drizzles down the slate,
Full of colors,
seemingly tears for the Reaper of chills.
It turns out the slate is inscribed with poems,
And every phrase
Is diligently colored with skill.
「人们仍未逝去时，
我为他们写下这些诗篇。」
少女的回应仅止于此——
若想求得一阅，
她只会沉默以对。
"Before people pass away,
I write down these poems."
That is the limit of the girl's answer —
And she only responds with silence
for requests to read these poems.
3-2
时日推移，她打开花瓣遮掩的心，
那不愿将作品示人的原因终于澄清：
「我的文辞还太过稚嫩…不值过目。」
——是源于少女的羞愧。
As time goes, she finally opens her petal-veiled heart,
And the reason behind her reluctance to show her work is finally clear:
"My poems are still too green... Not worthy to be art."
— It stems from the girl's shame and discomfort.
似乎，少女也曾热衷于凭空想象，
不少野史出于她手。
是一场误会，使她就此罢手。
It seems the girl once also loved to imagine with effort,
And many wild tales were written on her part.
A misunderstanding was what made her cease this art.
那是一对在战争中扬名的宿敌，
其中一位在看过少女的诗篇后，放声大笑——
「我和那家伙分明你死我活。」
「但在你看来，我们竟然惺惺相惜？」
It was a pair of archenemies who gained fame in the war,
One of them burst into laughter after reading the girl's poetic words —
"He and I clearly wish to kill and tear each other apart."
"But in your eyes, you think we are close, unable to part?"
3-3
她并非将诗用以消遣，
据说，她曾以数百个名字留下著作。
在不同的时代里，
她甚至批判自己曾经的观念，
因此，她的身份难以勘破。
She did not write poetry as a pastime.
It is said that she left great works under hundreds of names.
In different times,
She even criticized her previous beliefs,
Making her identity even harder to assume.
几经辗转，
我仍是寻得了她的破绽——
无论思绪何等多变，
对于人们易逝生命的价值，
字里行间，她始终没有失去信心。
I still found her weakness
After many twists and turns —
No matter how fickle her thoughts,
She never lost faith, in those words,
Regarding the value of fragile mortal lives.
令人心碎，令人心醉，
她是死亡的指头，
也是诗与爱的鬼魅。
She is heartbreaking and enchanting,
She is the fingertips of death,
And the ghost of love and poetry.
3-4
然而，这些诗篇也曾为她招致埋怨——
经她之手写下的词句，
全数缺少结局，
而死亡的侍女从无再续的意愿。
However, those poems have brought her many complaints —
The poems that her hands composed,
All lack an ending of any kind,
And the maid of death has no desire to continue them.
「这实在难以下笔…」
少女如此辩解，
「我的使命，是将生者引向结局。」
「对于死者，我想不出结尾的诗句。」
"This is truly difficult to write..."
The girl excuses herself,
"My duty is to lead the living to the end."
"I cannot think of a fitting end for a poem to the dead."
口是心非莫过于此——
习惯于死亡的人，
未必擅于道别。
Such is the epitome of lies —
One who's grown used to death,
Remains inexperienced with farewells.
3-5
于是，我向她发出邀请——
在这篇属于她自己的故事中，
留下一句自己的结尾。
Therefore, I extend her an invitation —
In this story belonging to herself,
She can leave an ending reserved only for her.
「…她所带来的事物，并非仅有死亡。」
初次相见时，
她如此回应。
而在那最后一次的重逢时，
她再度斟酌了这句尾声——
"...What she brings is not only death."
She thus replied
When we first met.
And when we meet once again for the last time,
She again deliberates over this closing statement —
「除却死亡，她还有其他东西，
值得为人铭记。」
"Apart from death, there is something else
That is worth remembering."
这便是她走完的一程。
That is the journey she walked.
风仍温暖时 When The Wind Was Warm
4-1
两位少女于麦田嬉戏，
脚步如鹿般轻灵，
浅洼里踩出层层涟漪。
The two girls frolicked in the wheat fields,
Fleet as doe deer,
Making ripples in the shallow puddles and pools clear.
暮色将至，
疲惫的少女们躺倒在麦堆上，
交换着憧憬与美梦：
文学，爱情，横渡大地的旅行。
As dusk approaches,
The exhausted girls collapse over the wheat heaps,
Talking about their longings and dreams:
Of literature, love, and a journey through a world dear.
「天空啊，你慢些阖眼，
我多想将此刻留在手心，
直到永远。」
"O Sky, slow your closing gaze,
How I want to keep this moment in my hands,
Forevermore."
彼时轻风温暖和煦，
彼时死亡柔软甘甜。
On that day, the breeze was warm and gentle.
At that time, death was soft and fair.
4-2
片翼的蝴蝶凋落窗前，
捎来忧悒的气息。
The broken-winged butterfly falls by the window,
Bringing with it a scent of melancholy.
少女偏头望向窗外，
再度金黄的麦浪无边无际。
她撑住椅子，尝试起身，
双腿却绵软无力。
The girl looks outside,
The golden wheat fields rolled endlessly, stretching to the horizon.
Holding to the chair, she tries to stand,
Only to find her legs trembling and feeble.
「玻吕茜亚，不要心急。」
姐姐俯身在她耳畔轻语，
她依偎在姐姐肩上啜泣。
"Don't worry, Polyxia."
Her older sister whispers beside her ear,
And on her sister's shoulder, the girl weeps mournfully.
时光也因此沉默，
唯有叹息。
And time thus becomes silent,
Painted with sighs only.
4-3
初闻医士诊断时，
少女漠然不动。
她的泪眼早已干涸，
她的心早已枯寂。
When hearing the healer's diagnosis,
The girl remained deathly still.
Her eyes were already drained of tears,
And her heart a wilted grave.
「每有难言心事，
她总是偏头望向窗外。」
姐姐沿着视线眺去，
荒地被风沙搅成一片灰漠。
"Every time she has something on her mind,
She would tilt her head and look outside."
Her sister follows her gaze,
Seeing a barren field turned by wind into a desolate gray expanse.
直至某日，
少女偏头望向窗外，
一抹幽蓝闯入她的视野。
Till one day,
When the girl looks outside,
She sees a dash of dark blue most brave.
「那是姐姐种下的花。」
如同奔涌生命的河流，
浇入她的内心。
"It's a flower my sister planted."
Like the torrential river of life,
It pours into the depths of her heart.
4-4
花的名字被唤作「安提灵」，
传言在冥土也能顽强盛开。
「你是我心中的宁静。」
似乎有着如此花语。
The flower is called "Antila,"
Even in the nether land, it's rumored to thrive.
"You are the quiet in my heart amidst the chaotic choreography."
That seems to be its floriography.
风和日暄时分，
姐姐会带着少女出门远行。
翻弄花田，远眺湖岸。
于花丛中午睡、谈心。
When the days are warm,
The sister would take the girl on long journeys.
Through the flower fields, gazing upon rivers,
Napping amongst the grove, a discussion hearty.
「死后我想变成一束『安提灵』，
成为你心中的宁静。」
少女不经意的一句，
却换来额间轻轻敲击。
"After I die, I want to become an Antila flower,
And become the quietness in your soul."
A thoughtless word from the girl,
Gains her a rapping on her forehead most dainty.
「清晨勿言黄昏事。」
花在垂下它的露滴，
风在摇曳它的叶子，
两人坐着，悄无声息。
"Do not speak of dusk when you have yet to see the dawn."
Dew drops from the petals,
As wind pulls on the leaves,
And the two of them sit, in quietude.
4-5
少女请教花田的照料方法。
姐姐嘴上说着担忧，
心中却如释重负。
The girl asks for the means to tend to the garden,
And while her sister sounds concerned,
Her heart is relieved.
可担忧不无道理——
少女不幸滑入深潭中，
于无天无地的池底，
与死亡行了贴面礼。
But the concern is well-founded —
The girl tripped and fell into a mire,
She gazed directly into the eyes of death,
In that dark pool bottom unperceived.
「耽误了姐姐的人生，
就此结束也罢。」
少女放弃了挣扎，
却看见一道身影刺破水面——
"I've been the weight upon my sister's wings...
Let this be where it all comes to rest."
The girl gives up her struggles,
Only to see a figure pierce through the water's surface —
「不许你独自迈过黄昏，
走进那片黑夜里。」
姐姐啜泣不止，
少女只好紧紧偎抱、小心安抚。
"I won't allow you to walk through the dusk alone,
Or enter the night of no reprieve."
Her sister sobs without end,
And the girl has to gently hug her, and softly relieve.
…至此，遥远的记忆已晦暗不清。
...And then, this distant memory turns bleary, difficult to retrieve.
逆着冥河上行 Upstream Along the River of Souls
5-1
冥河围裹着大地的黑夜流向彼岸，
静缓，深阔，恒无止息。
它属于存于世的所有生灵，
顺流而下，殊途同归。
The River of Souls flows to the other side, wrapped in the land's night,
Broad, slow, an eternal and silent sight.
It belongs to all in this world that has life,
All of which flows downstream, converging as one.
冥界的主人塞纳托斯，
将自己与魂灵置于月之茧中。
The master of the nether realm, Thanatos,
Enshrouds themself and the souls within the Moon Cocoon.
破茧而出的巨龙载着一名少女，
逆溯冥河，于狭间上行。
The dragon, born from the cocoon, carries a girl,
soaring upstream the River of Souls, defying its eternal flow.
二者的相系比血脉更紧密。
洞开冥府之门的钥匙，
是妹妹的私心。
Their connection flows tighter than blood,
And the key that opens the netherworld's gates,
Is the sister's selfish plight.
彼时朔风凛冽刺骨，
彼时死亡苦涩难咽。
Back then, the boreal winds cut through to the bone.
Back then, death was a bitter and stabbing fright.
5-2
于无天无地的冥界，
盛开着名为「安提灵」的花，
赏花者徒余一人。
In the nether realm without an earth or sky,
A flower named Antila blooms,
its beauty witnessed by but one soul.
「你是我心中的宁静。」
妹妹寻遍花开簇满的「安提灵」，
却寻不到约定的那束幽蓝。
"You are the quiet in my heart amidst the chaotic choreography."
The younger sister scores through the blooming Antila fields,
Never finding that promised dark blue sprig.
她暗自下定决心，
「死亡，将你的黑夜都归我，
黎明就留给她吧。」
She silently made up her mind.
"Death. Leave all your dark nights to me,
And save the dawns for her."
妹妹望向高悬的月之茧，
筹措起奔赴人间的远行。
The younger sister gazes at the Moon Cocoon high above,
And plans a trip to the mortal realm, a distant flurry.
5-3
曾有诗人拨弦清唱：
「不可回头，不可回头。
灰黯的长手会将亡者挽留。」
A bard once sung to musical notes:
"Do not turn back. O do not turn back.
The long hand of shadow will retain the dead behind their gates."
月之茧中诞生的巨龙，
甘愿做那冥河里往返的长船。
「无需回头，无需回头。
那代价早已有人替你承受。」
The giant dragon born from the Moon Cocoon
Willingly offered itself as the enduring barge of the River of Souls.
"No need to turn back. Oh, no need to turn back.
That price had long been paid for you by someone else."
巨龙垂下长颈，
将少女驮上脊背。
她将沉眠着，一无所知地，
迎接新生的黎明。
The dragon lowers its long neck,
And places the girl on its back.
In slumber, she will unknowingly greet
The dawn of her rebirth.
5-4
巨龙翻动双翼，
于亡者漂流的寒溟中逆航。
The dragon flaps its wings,
In the chilly gloom of the floating dead, upstream.
从沉静渡向喧嚣，
从清澈渡向肮脏。
Ferrying from purity into grime,
Going from silence {F#in}to roaring boom.
无名诗人的灵魂掠水而过，
遥远的诗句不绝如缕：
The souls of countless poets flounder past,
Their distant rhymes endless like foams:
「不可回头，不可回头。
望向人间，便是回头。」
"Do not turn back.
For to look toward the land of mortals, is in itself turning back."
苍茫的拂晓，
黑夜燃起一缕黎明。
于是巨龙渡过冥海，
在岸上搁浅。
In this pale dawn,
The sun's first rays light the night ablaze.
So the dragon crosses the Sea of Souls,
Onto the shores of life, and strands itself in the gleam.
5-5
此间的故事，
不知从何处而来。
随着浪花，散落于浅滩大地。
We know not where
These stories arise.
They are scattered across the shallows with the waves.
少女别离前的告白，
依旧回荡在潮汐：
The confession the girl made before her departure,
Still echoes in the tides' heaves.
「倘若还要留下些什么，
希望有人能将它们记忆。
"If there is anything for me to leave behind,
May it find a soul to remember.
这是属于我的诗篇，
我已写下最后一笔。」
This is the ode of my life,
And I've already penned my last stroke."
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