幻月游戏突发事件应对指南 Phantasmoon Games Emergency Response Guide

由异常防御部统一印刷、派发,针对幻月游戏突发事件的指导手册。 A guidebook for Phantasmoon Games emergencies, printed and distributed by the Department of Aberration Defense.

在幻月游戏期间,因谒者献上的「奇迹」、过饱和的愿力、异常灾害的集中生成等因素,二相乐园将出现诸多不可预测的异常现象及事故。请本地居民及外星游客保持冷静,时刻关注异常防御部的新闻报道,远离危险区域,安全享受本次幻月游戏。如有遭遇突发事件,请参照应对指南,可以极大地提高您的生还概率。

During the Phantasmoon Games, numerous unpredictable aberrations and incidents will occur throughout Planarcadia due to factors such as "miracles" offered by Supplicants, oversaturated Wishpower, and concentrated generation of aberrant disasters. All local residents and off-world visitors are advised to remain calm, stay tuned to news reports from the Department of Aberration Defense, steer clear of dangerous zones, and safely enjoy the Phantasmoon Games. Should you encounter any emergencies, please refer to the response guidelines, which can greatly improve your chances of survival.

1、当您身处谒者引发的异象时,请第一时间远离,向「家」的方向前进。在此期间,不要回答任何从您的背后及右方传来的声音。

1. If you find yourself caught in an anomaly triggered by a Supplicant, immediately distance yourself and head toward "home." During this time, do not respond to any voices coming from behind you or from your right.

2、「家」是可供人类居住的封闭或半封闭空间,一般含有椅子、床、洗手台等物体。若你身处的「家」不符合以上定义,立刻阅读以下内容——「没有在巨型牙齿上跳舞的猴子,鲸鱼的肚子里看不见黑色蜥蜴」,保持静止,等待异常防御部发出安全公告。

2. "Home" is an enclosed or semi-enclosed space suitable for human habitation, generally containing objects such as chairs, beds, washbasins, etc. If the "home" you are in does not meet the above definition, immediately read the following: "There are no monkeys dancing on giant teeth, and no black lizards can be seen in the whale's belly." Remain still, and wait for a safety notice from the Department of Aberration Defense.

3、异常防御部的安全公告有广播、电视新闻、网络直播等几种形式。播报员的头部应该由眼耳口鼻组成,不是菠萝或者苹果。

3. Safety Notices from the Department of Aberration Defense come in several forms: broadcasts, TV News, online streams, and so on. The broadcaster's head should consist of eyes, ears, a mouth, and a nose, not a pineapple or an apple.

(相关报道:欢愉面具被谜语人盗窃,三进制市民众认知中的名词与动词遭到替换,引发大规模混乱,犯人至今仍未归案。

(Related Report: Masks of Elation were stolen by The Riddlers, nouns and verbs in the cognition of Ternary City citizens have been swapped, causing mass chaos. Perpetrators still at large.)

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15、当您迷失方向,且处于谒者的影响范围内,可以进入临近的画中世界残卷避难。但请注意,在绝大多数情况下,画的残卷不会说话,不会笑,也没有牙齿。

  1. If you lose your way and find yourself within a Supplicant's sphere of influence, you can take refuge in a nearby fragment of the World in Canvas. But please note: In the vast majority of cases, canvas fragments won't talk, won't laugh, and have no teeth.

16、画中世界边缘的安全地带,拥有近似现实的3个维度坐标轴,如果发现您的身体开始二维化,请立刻原路返回。

  1. The safe zone at the edge of the World in Canvas retains close to reality's three-dimensional coordinate axes. If you notice your body starting to become two-dimensional, immediately turn back the way you came.

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30、从高空大规模落下的物体通常是雨,雨是水的聚合体,不是糖果,也不是古董翻盖手机。如果您遭遇相似现象,请不要接听糖果的消息,不要食用手机。

  1. Objects that fall from the sky en masse are usually rain. Rain is a collection of water, not candy, and definitely not vintage flip phones. If you encounter a similar phenomenon, do not answer messages from the candy, and do not eat the phone.

31、笑话是一段能诱使人发笑的信息,不具备活动能力。如果一段笑话自称将前往好友电冰箱的婚礼,当场抢走它的电动牙刷新娘,请乘坐最近的科幻小说离开。

  1. A joke is a piece of information designed to induce laughter and does not possess the ability to move. If a joke claims it's heading to its friend the refrigerator's wedding to steal away its electric toothbrush bride, please board the nearest science fiction novel and get out of there.

(相关报道:一假面愚者利用「乐子神的赐礼」,在虹彩市制造出无限非概率现象,被酒馆与异常防御部联合讨伐。

(Related report: A Masked Fool exploited the "Gift of The Laughter" to create infinite improbability phenomena in Rainbow City, and was subsequently taken down in a joint operation by the tavern and the Department of Aberration Defense.)

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102、如果您不慎被关入了电视,请站在最靠近屏幕的位置,让自己的拍摄画面最大限度地占据屏幕。当您的耳边传来合唱的儿歌时,请务必不要跟唱。

  1. If you happen to get trapped inside a television, stand as close to the screen as possible to maximize your on-screen presence. When you hear children's songs being sung in chorus around you, whatever you do, do NOT sing along.

103、当您做出以上尝试时,确保自己是在电视机内,不是正试图走进电视当中。

  1. When attempting the above, make sure you're inside the TV, not trying to walk into it.

(相关报道:儿童节目主持人将大量观众带入没有烦恼的「童话王国」,目前已被定性为诱拐事件。)

(Related Report: Children's program host lures massive audience into a carefree "Fairy Tale Kingdom," now officially classified as a kidnapping case.)

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温馨提示,本指南将于每次幻月游戏后补充、修订,请确保您手中的指南为本次幻月游戏发行的最新版本。

Friendly reminder: This guide will be updated and revised after each round of Phantasmoon Games. Please ensure you have the latest version published for the current Phantasmoon Games.

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