丹枢的日记 Dan Shu's Diary

丹鼎司丹士长丹枢的日记。其中记录了这位盲眼丹士与命运的抗争。 The diary of Dan Shu, Chief Alchemist of the Alchemy Commission. It records this blind diviner's struggles against her destiny.

……

...

帝弓司命啊，我向您倾诉。

Please hear me, Reignbow Arbiter.

雨菲去参加战争了。

Yufei is enlisted in the war.

这是联盟与丰饶民的第三场大战，我认识的很多人都去参战了。只是我始终没想到，雨菲也会收到诏令。

This is the third great war between the Alliance and the Denizens of Abundance. Many people I know went to the war, but I never imagined Yufei would be conscripted as well.

「联盟需要最好的医士，而我恰好是最好的医士，这我有什么办法嘛！」雨菲捧着我的脸，故作轻松地说道。

"The Alliance needs the best healer, and I happen to be the best healer. That can't be helped, right?" Yufei held my head in her palms as she said this in pretended carelessness.

我握住雨菲的手，急切地说：「罗浮有那么多医士，不必是你。你又不是云骑，这些都是可以推辞的……」

I grabbed Yufei's hand and replied anxiously. "The Luofu has so many healers. Why does it have to be you? You're not a Cloud Knight. You can refuse..."

「我知道你担心我，」雨菲温柔地劝慰道，「我只是随军医士，并不会遇到最危险的情况。况且，帝弓在上，定会护我周全的。」

"I know you're worried about me." Yufei comforted me gently. "I'm just a healer. I won't be in danger. Besides, the Arbiter will keep me safe."

她去意已决，我只能几乎是哀求地对她说：「你是一个了不起的人，在没有我的世界里，你也能活得很好。可我是一个渺小的人，我不知道该怎么在一个没有你的世界里活着。所以，请你一定要回来。」

She had made up her mind to go. I could only beg her. "You're an amazing person. You can live a happy life even without me. But I'm weak. I don't know how to live in a world without you. So please, please return in one piece."

雨菲无奈地笑了：「我也不能没有你呀！放心吧，我一定会回来的。」

Yufei laughed haplessly. "I can't live without you either! Trust me. I'll be back safe and sound."

她放开我的手。我蹲在地上，捂住耳朵，蜷缩成一团，不肯听到她离去的声音。

She then let go of my hand. I knelt on the ground, covered my ears, and curled up in a ball. I didn't want to listen to the sounds of her leaving.

帝弓司命啊，请让她平安归来。

Reignbow Arbiter, please bring her back safely.

……

...

长乐天市区有人堕入魔阴身，造成了不小的破坏。十王司的判官来委托我们对那位堕入魔阴者的遗体进行解剖。

Someone became mara-struck in the urban area of the Exalting Sanctum and caused quite a bit of destruction. We have been assigned by the Judges of the Ten-Lords Commission to conduct an autopsy on his corpse.

解剖结果非常令我在意，因此在这里稍微记一笔。

The results of the autopsy were very interesting to me. I'm going to record it here for future reference.

此人生前是一名天缺者，没有四肢且患有先天性心脏病。但解剖结果显示，在堕入魔阴之后，那些缺陷似乎都不存在了。

The deceased was an Incomplete One. He was born without limbs and had a congenital heart condition. However, the autopsy indicated all his disabilities seemed to have completely disappeared after he became struck with mara.

他的四肢比黄石牛还健壮，心脏则像星槎引擎似的。事实上，文献中经常有类似的记载，但实际遇到这种情况，还是颇为震撼。

His limbs became stronger than a yellow boulder calf's, and his heart was as steady as a starskiff's engine. In fact, such records are often to be found in the annals of history, but I'm still very stunned to come face-to-face with such an occurrence.

不得不说，我似乎一直在刻意忽略一种治疗天缺者的方案…也就是拥抱寿瘟祸祖的力量。毕竟谁也没听说过步离人中有什么「天缺者」。

I have to admit that I have been deliberately ignoring one particular cure for the Incomplete Ones... Specifically, to accept the Plagues Author's power. After all, no one had heard about there being Incomplete Ones among the borisin.

也许的确存在一种方式，可以无害地应用寿瘟祸祖的力量。

Perhaps there indeed exists a way to harmlessly utilize the Plagues Author's power.

当然，这只是一种纸面上的狂想罢了。做这种试验，那就真是杀头的罪过了。

Of course, this is only a fleeting fantasy. Doing such experiments would be a crime worthy of death.

以防万一，写给调查到这本日记的十王司判官：以上内容皆为在下的妄想，并无任何计划将之付诸实践。

Just in case, these words are for any future Judge of the Ten-Lords Commission who may investigate this diary: The above content is all my fantasies, and I have no plans of executing them.

……

...

最近时常与雨菲通信。

Yufei and I wrote many letters to each other recently.

她在后方的战地医院，暂时算是安全地带。

She's safe for now at the field hospital away from the front lines.

我当然不可能不担心，但也只能默默祈祷。

Of course, I'm worried about her, but the only thing I can do is silently pray.

帝弓司命啊，求您保她周全。

Reignbow Arbiter, please keep her safe.

……

...

战争结束了，我们赢了，雨菲死了。

The war is over. We won, and Yufei is dead.

我怎么也想不明白，为什么她会死在后方的战地医院。

I can't understand how she could die in the field hospital away from the fighting.

我像个疯女人一样追问了很久，那几个云骑才不得不告诉我真相。

I kept asking and asking like I was mad, till the Cloud Knights finally told me the truth.

帝弓司命降世临凡，用神矢剿灭了步离人的舰队。而在这个过程中，祂的神恩也造成了一些「附加伤害」——雨菲所在的战地医院，就是其中之一。

The Reignbow Arbiter had descended onto the physical plane and annihilated the borisin fleet using THEIR divine arrow. At the same time, THEIR divine miracle wrought some "collateral damage" — such as the field hospital Yufei was based in.

她没有死在丰饶民的手上，却竟在帝弓司命的神矢之下灰飞烟灭、尸骨无存。

She did not die in the hands of the Denizens of Abundance. Instead, she was ground to dust by the Reignbow Arbiter's divine arrow, with not even a single bone of her left behind.

帝弓司命啊，为什么？

Why, Reignbow Arbiter?

……

...

帝弓司命啊，这是我最后一次向您倾诉。

Reignbow Arbiter, this will be the last time I write to you.

我愿您期望毁灭的都复生。

I wish all that you hope to destroy are resurrected.

我愿您期望生存的都毁灭。

I wish all that you hope to preserve is annihilated.

我愿地上一切的生灵都忤逆您的意志去生长。

I wish all lives in the land will thrive contrary to your desires.

我愿天上一切的星辰都因为您的存在而熄灭。

I wish all stars in the sky will be dimmed because of your existence.

我愿这银河是属于生命的，而不是属于死灭的。

I wish this cosmos to be full of life, and not full of death.

我愿联盟可以永存，但并不以您期望的方式。

I wish the Alliance will exist forever, but not in the way you desired.